The Human Freelancer

Happy and honest self-employment for conscientious newcomers

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Perhaps you hate your job because it consumes most of your time and leaves you exhausted. What little free time you do have is spent running up debt to pay for shit you don’t really need or changing the way you look.

Do you feel miserable and unfulfilled at worst? Desensitised at best?

Welcome to your antidote.

I’ve been where you are now and know exactly how you feel. I’m still a miserable cunt sometimes but let me reassure you: there’s 806% more chance of you feeling happy and fulfilled as a freelancer than there ever will be in full-time salaried employment. And this website and its accompanying book are your guides to becoming one.

“But is self-employment really for me?”

If you:

  • Are human
  • Can wipe your own arse
  • Enjoy freedom and happiness

Then yes, you’re ready to become a human freelancer because you’re an innately talented and creative problem-solver, self-sufficient and adaptable, and above all else you deserve to be happy.

“Oh but change is scary Chris!”

Yes it is a bit, at first, but it’s nowhere near as scary as the prospect of Monday morning chained to your sterile office cubicle, missing your kids growing up or working all your life for a pension then finding out you caught cancer from lusty Denise in accounts during a frosty knee-trembler in the disabled bogs at your work’s Christmas do.

If you’ve read this far I suspect you have a sense of humour (or lots of patience). That means you’ll definitely enjoy the caustic tone of delivery used in The Human Freelancer, a book diligently crafted to inspire you into self-employment and furnish you with the basics of getting more out of how you earn a living.

Yet we’re not talking about money-spinning. If you want to earn more but do less, feel free to cruise through exabytes of pyramid scheme websites and bullshit how-to quick-fixes already out there which offer empty promises in exchange for a hefty investment.

The human freelancer movement isn’t about making or taking money, it’s about doing the right thing and earning enough to live so you have more free time to do everything else in life that you enjoy.

“What’s life like on the other side then?”

  • No more alarm clocks: continue dreaming about sexy dolphins at your leisure
  • Politics-free: the only cunts grappling for power are the puppets in the news
  • Freedom from avarice: frugality means you stop craving shit
  • You’re the boss: pick and choose what you’d like to do
  • Endless bonuses: cancel Mondays, cake every day

If you like the sound of life as a human freelancer then come and join us.

The Human Freelancer book

LOOK! There's a book full of this shit and more!

Self-help business books perpetuate the myth that success is relentless growth and more of everything means progress. They preach about bookkeeping and market research: things you might need to do of course. But let’s face it they’re fucking boring.

The Human Freelancer book is your antidote: stuffed full of emotional support and insightful advice for vulnerable newbies to self-employment like you.

Buy it now